Sunday, November 18, 2012

TWILIGHT BREAKING DAWN: PART 2 - tangerine dreams for marshmallow minds

The most epic battle in 3 millennia—the ultimate showdown between primordial powers and nascent love riddled vampires—the terrifying collusion of man and beast—with special effects not eclipsed since Star Wars and the divine acting talents not yet equaled in the history of teen cinema—the supreme denouement—a film for the ages. Sure.

This has got to be one of the most baffling bad series of films ever made. They are obviously not made for someone like me—I'm clearly not the demographic—I am not a wanton teenage girl or a dejected mother. That said, why should I say anything about it at all? Well, I always try to keep an open mind. Even if something does not seem to appeal to me, I will generally try to give a shot anyway because you never know what you may learn or even come to cherish. So in comes Twilight. Surely this has very little, if anything, good to say about anything. 

I believe I comprehend. A teenage girl, not beautiful per say but rather average, someone like you—becomes the obsession of the 'hottest' supernatural guy around. Ok. You certainly reciprocate. You fall in love, like real love, your first love, über crazy lovey dovey love. You might say, well alright, what's so bad about that? Every teenage fantasy. I guess what I find terribly disingenuous and downright insidiously malicious is that ideas like this seem to be treated as something that should be your sole desire or lifelong goal of wish fulfillment and the idea of everlasting love being the only thing that matters in life. Not reality. Who cares, its a movie, you say. A fantasy, no less. I guess I wouldn't, except for the unconscionable amount of unseemly interest and swoon by the millions. Young girls want to believe in this drivel and do. The doddering writer, Stephenie Meyer, seems to be exploiting her own unrealized teenage feelings. 

It's possible to have good teenage or any age fantasy narratives without appealing to an emotional pseudo-reality. Harry Potter for instance. Films like Twilight plant fatuous ideas into young people and only set them up for disappointment. Likewise, the filmmakers did a piss poor job on all the films. The special effects are of kindergarten quality as well as the structure of the story. They also seemed to dumb down the whole enterprise. Teens are far smarter than you think—they should be treated as such—yet, if you tamper with their developing, sensitive emotions you are bound to come out on top. Thank you Ms. Meyer for the imminent destruction of countless teen psychologies and handing pharmaceuticals the next generation of drug dependent sociopaths. 

Recommended Viewing: Harry Potter Saga - Lord Of The Rings Saga - Star Wars Saga

              Bob Scale: The Critic: 4.0   -   The Fan: 2.4
             MetaCritic: 53
 Rotten Tomatoes: 51
                    IMDB: 5.8

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