Saturday, August 18, 2012

THE EXPENDABLES 2 - testosterone squared

Most guys, I would dare to assume, have some inner desire to blow shit up, be the biggest badass on the block, have the greatest stature with the biggest muscles, the balls to go headfirst into ultra dangerous situations with giddy composure, and all the while destroy, wreak havoc and kill everything in sight. We all have fightin genes. The Expendables sequel fulfills those impulses to become an uber manly man man man. 

This is a movie you have to be older to enjoy. You have to go in with a load (about 30 years) of previous action movie experiences to get the full benefit. It requires a certain amount of fanboy love and childhood awe for maximum enjoyment. 

The whole film, I could barely help myself from conjuring a smile because seeing all these great ole action stars together in one place brings with it, much humor and nostalgia. I was not expecting a very good film overall - I did not care for the first one - but I ended up enjoying this one. It's still not a very good movie; many times the script is piss poor juxtaposed to a weak linear storyline but who cares, I guess, you get to see Chuck Norris sniping bad guys from afar while Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis are spinning out of control in a tiny Euro car unloading giant,  deafening machine guns on dozens of inferior minions all the while Sylvester Stallone and Jean-Cluade Van Damme have an epic fight scene to the death!!! At points I felt that these guys were so jacked and full of steroids that even their facial muscles had muscles which affected their talking ability. This movie is a pipe dream for guys with one female thrown in for good measure. You will get plenty of vintage one liners, lots of bloody, ridiculous action stunts and a virtual panoply of forgotten greats.

Recommended Viewing: Die Hard - Rambo - Rocky IV - The Terminator - Bloodsport - Delta Force

              Bob Scale: Objective: 6.2   -   Subjective: 7.8
             MetaCritic: 54
 Rotten Tomatoes: 64
                    IMDB: 8.0

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